Top 5 Common Questions About Therapy (and some unconventional answers)

Many moons before I became a therapist, I wondered about therapy for myself.

I wasn't sure where to start or what to expect, and to be honest, I almost gave up after a few false starts.

My first therapist was great, but she moved cities after our second session (this was well before online therapy was a thing). The second one I saw once — but him unprofessional and later learned he had no formal training. My third therapist seemed extremely nervous —giving me the impression he was better suited to studying psychology than practicing it.

Finally, consult calls became a thing. As a student with limited time and even more limited dollars, I was especially grateful for a chance to test the fit. I now have an amazing therapist.

Just finding a therapist can feel like its own journey, so I looked up some of the most common questions people ask Google about therapy — and answered them myself below. I hope my answers help you feel a little more confident and prepared to find the best support.

Common Questions About Therapy

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1. What Does a Counsellor Do?

Techniques and theoretical orientations aside, most simply, I believe a therapist shows you what unconditional love feels like. Full acceptance of who you are as a human being. In the space of this kind of emotional safety, your defences can melt; you get to experience yourself in a new light.

When we feel safe and loved, curiosity can replace judgment, and following that curiosity can lead to real change.

We keep many parts of ourselves hidden for fear of rejection, embarrassment, or shame, but these parts are often running the subconscious show. What might you be able to work through, when you're not bracing against what feels too unbearable to see? Who do you become in this kind of environment — and over time, how might you carry that version of yourself out into the rest of your life?

I love all of my clients, and to me, that means doing my utmost to walk alongside them in a way that helps reach their best self.

Here's an even less conventional answer to the same question:

We carefully confront what keeps clients stuck. Not confrontation in the harsh sense — more like holding up a mirror with care. We notice blind spots. We name unhealthy patterns. We might gently push clients to examine their own boundaries: are you relying on others in an unbalanced way instead of learning to self-soothe? Are you acting like a doormat because it feels safer than risking rejection by setting a boundary with someone else? Does your idea of being regulated mean never being triggered, and cutting out anything that makes you uncomfortable?

At the heart of it, we examine the parts of life keeping clients stuck in unhealthy cycles, so they can finally break free of them.

The endgame is for us to get to the root of where the unhealthy patterns came from in the first place — not just the symptom — and find healing here. Until that happens, we can also help with building coping skills. I often use an iceberg analogy. At the surface we have symptoms (which we can absolutely look at learn coping tools to manage) but much deeper, there is a whole history that upholds what we see up top.

We do not: hand out advice; clients are the expert on their own life. Our job is to help people find their own solutions using their own inner wisdom.

Over time, the work may seem subtle, but builds. For instance, enhanced self-awareness (access to that inner knowing), emotional intelligence, situational skills, relational awareness, and so forth all contribute to the evolving foundation of our lives.

2. How Do I Get a Counsellor?

Finding the right counsellor can feel overwhelming, especially if you don't know where to start. Here are some practical steps I've found useful:

• Search online. Psychology Today for example, is a great tool that lets you filter for specific specialties (trauma, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, family therapy, couples therapy, and so on). Here's what my page looks like on the platform.

• Ask for recommendations from friends, family, and so on.

• Check credentials to make sure the counsellor is licensed and experienced.

• Contact your insurance provider if you have it, and are unsure if you are covered.

• Schedule a consultation to see if you feel comfortable with the counsellor and to jumpstart the first session.

Therapy is a personal journey, so it's okay to try a few counsellors before finding the right fit. Take the time to interview as many as you need before committing to one.

Common factors research across therapy effectiveness studies consistently points to the same conclusion: while your own resources and support system outside of therapy matter most, the quality of the relationship you build with your therapist is the single biggest factor within the therapy room itself — greater than which specific technique or approach they use. In other words, the connection you build with your therapist matters more than the years of experience they have, techniques they use, or the letters after their name.

3. Does a Counsellor Take Insurance?

Cost is a big concern — and a massive barrier — for many people considering therapy. As it stands, "do you take insurance?" is one of the most common questions I hear. The answer varies depending on the counsellor and your specific plan; most operate on a private-pay basis where you pay up front and submit for reimbursement yourself.

To find out if your insurance covers therapy:

• Contact your insurance company directly. Plans typically cover sessions with a Registered Clinical Counsellor (RCC), Canadian Clinical Counsellor (CCC), Registered Social Worker (RSW), or Registered Psychologist — though coverage isn't universal across all designations, so it's worth confirming your specific plan and provider.

  
  

• Find out exactly how much coverage you have. Is it the full session amount up to a certain yearly limit? A portion of each session?

  
  

If insurance isn't an option and you're genuinely struggling financially, many therapists (like myself) offer sliding-scale fees based on income, and community mental health centres may offer low-cost or free services.

4. How Long Does Therapy Take?

I often tell folks: my job is to put myself out of a job.

I feel like we've "arrived" when you don't need me anymore — for the particular issue you came in hoping to change. Of course, I'll be here whenever new concerns bubble up, or if your specific situation needs intensive and on-going support. I tend to see clients over many years, but not every week. The cadence of our meetings depends on the concern, but I do recommend coming in regularly at the start — if sessions are too spread out early on, they can start to feel like a check-in rather than the deep dive most hope for.

It also depends on your goals and the issues you want to address. Some people find relief after a few sessions, while others (as mentioned) benefit from months or even years of ongoing support.

Therapy can be short-term, focused on a specific problem like grief or anxiety, or long-term, aimed at deeper personal growth. Your counsellor should work with you to set realistic goals and check in on progress along the way.

5. What Should I Expect in My First Therapy Session?

Walking into a therapy session for the first time can reveal a variety of emotions. Many ask, what should I expect in my first therapy session?  The first session usually involves:

• Talking about confidentiality and how therapy works (though this may be covered in the intake form).

• Introducing yourself and sharing why you sought therapy.

• Discussing your history, current challenges, and goals.

• Asking any questions you have about the process.

  
  

The counsellor’s role is to make you feel comfortable and will guide the sessions, so if you don't know where to start, that's completely fine!

Rapid-Fire Bonus Q&A Section:

• How long are therapy sessions? 

  • A "50 minute hour" is typical, where the last ten minutes of the hour are used to reset between clients. If you need more time than this, see if the therapist offers different options. I offer 50, 70, and 100 minute sessions.

    
    

• Will my therapist keep my information confidential? 

  • Yes, with a few legally required exceptions (like risk of harm to yourself or others).

    
    

• How do I know if therapy is working? 

  • Look for small, real shifts over time — in how you respond to old triggers, how you talk to yourself, or how your relationships feel — rather than expecting a single dramatic turning point.

• What's the difference between a psychologist and a psychiatrist? 

  • A psychiatrist is a medical doctor who can prescribe medication; a psychologist (or counsellor) provides talk therapy and typically cannot prescribe.

• Can therapy be free? 

  • Sometimes — through EAPs, sliding-scale therapists, training clinics, or community mental health programs, depending on where you live.

  • I am a preferred provider for Vail's EAP. If you or anyone in your household works for Vail, you can get 6 sessions for free (and up to 12).

    
    

Have more questions? Schedule a free consult call by clicking here. I'd love to connect with you!